Tuesday, May 26, 2015

A Violet Vixen in Cincinnati

This weekend is the Trans Ohio Symposium up the road in Columbus and it was time to color the hair again. This year I was leaning towards something sort of age inappropriate that would stand out...just a little edgy. As Liz and I combed through (no pun intended) the seemingly millions of color combo's, I/we came up with a "Violet Vixen" color from Feria (Loreal). I have to say even I was a little scared when she kept playing with me having purple hair. Well, I don't and I love the color! It is one of those which changes colors when you see it from different angles. (I will try to get some more glitzy "selffies" as the week goes by-well at least selfies or Lizzy's cause she is taking them.)

Today we went out to Spring-Grove cemetery here in Cinci which is one of the most beautiful and historical in the country and just happens to be the final resting places of over 6000, Civil War Union troops. You can see all the flags where I am standing by what actually a canon standing on end and stretching out behind me. Below you can see one of the burial stones.

For some reason this year Memorial Day has meant more to me out here in dear old conservative Ohio. Yesterday we had a chance to stop by Liz's 90 (almost) year old Dad and thank him for his service in World War II. As you know, surviving WWII vets are getting rarer and rarer so Liz's Dad is a treasure.

 Of course as always I think how many of the fallen vets were actually our transgender sisters and brothers - and- they went from the closet to the grave. Hopefully the future will be brighter.

The true tragedy comes when some just don't seem to care at all and only see the weekend as a chance for a BBQ and extra day off.

Media Mania

First of all, you all know what I have thought about Bruce Jenner. However, I did see one of his coming out shows last night-his sit down conversation (tear jerker) with former wife Kris. And, I do know there are certain backstories which do or don't play in with me. But last night most did. Now, I did take what I saw last night at face value (no pun intended) and the story which played out between the two last night was ripped from the one which played out between my (deceased) wife and I.

Honesty, courage and communication ended up being our sticking points and I will admit I just couldn't "man up" and tell her how I really felt. I just didn't want to lose everything in life I held dear and wanted to have it both ways before I jumped off the gender cliff. I don't believe Jenner ever said it but the whole deal nearly killed me.

Also in the media recently has been the whole coming up story of the Duggar "19 and Counting Show" which has been cancelled on the TLC Network. In a classic "Bitch slap" Momma Karma beat up on Michelle Duggar who called transgender women child molesters and pedophiles in a recent anti LGBT campaign in her home state of Arkansas. Then, her son turns out to be the real deal pedophile with at least five underage girls including a couple sisters. Yes, the clan even knew of his molestations.

The whole story makes me sick from the 19 kids all the way to connections with Presidential candidate Mike Huckabee. I went an immediately took a shower with lye soap after hearing all of this.

Finally,former Defense Secretary Robert Gates (now head of the Boy Scouts) said the Boy Scouts ban on Gay Adult Scout Leaders is "not sustainable" and needs to change from within. My daughters family is a huge scouting family (boy and girl) and of course support LGBTQ leaders and are very happy with this!!!!

Quite the week!

Monday, May 25, 2015

A Layered HRT Life

Here is perhaps another oft discussed topic for the upcoming Simmons College seminar on transgender issues in June we are participating in here in Cyrsti's Condo.

In a recent post, Connie mentioned all the "practice" she put in following all the feminine mannerisms she observed. Generics most certainly do too as they attempt the journey from female to becoming their own woman. I am not going to attempt a right or wrong way, as each of us is different.

I used to talk about certain of the Mtf transgender transition issues I had with my generic friends but more often than not, all I got back in return was "welcome to our world."

Not being the "sharpest tack in the box" it took me awhile to figure out, the women didn't have the slightest idea on certain occasions of what their world was. I quit bringing it up.

Any woman I have ever brought up the fact my HRT transition has added "layers" to my life, has looked at me blankly-HUH? Woman are just born into a layered existence. Men, aren't and I do believe now (more and more) how much the differences are hormonal driven AND a major source of transgender dysphoria.

Back to Simmons. One of the most asked questions I get is "what were the most dramatics changes during my HRT transition?" Everyone expects physical changes such as breasts, skin and hair changes. In reality though (it takes awhile) you begin to see the world in different ways and many times you have no one to explain it to.

As I wrote, generics take it for granted as a pro or con birthright. I compare the process to my nephew who could throw a 92 mile per hour fastball in high school. He took it for granted and now it's merely a "remember when" topic at family get togethers.

Adding the layers has been a fascinating experience and I am sure many would say I really didn't need the HRT to become the person I am today and they too are right. There is no wrong answer. Except to just cop out and say "welcome to my world."

I wouldn't do that to you if I could help it!

A Life in Gender Flux