Tuesday, June 11, 2013

Is the Gender Grass Always Greener Elsewhere?

Along the my way down the transgender path, I’ve been fortunate enough to run into several strangers who seemingly just “popped” into my world-made an impression and left.  So many think the average trans woman or trans man encounters an inordinate number of negative people. I certainly haven't kept a scorecard but I would guess the opposite has been true for me.

Years ago a tall , strikingly attractive confident woman in her mid 40′s made it a point to strike up a conversation with me.  She knew I was trans and garnered bunches of attention.. Basically she just wanted to tell me to hold my head up and it probably wouldn't get appreciably better for people like us. No, she wasn't transgender or transsexual but she felt the burden of her height and looks as just a hassle at this point in her life. By "us" she was meaning women who cause attention in a room-believe me for completely different reasons in our sense. How nice!

She confided years ago she worked at one of the clubs operated by one of the biggest men's magazines. Not the one with a rabbit involved-but the other. She went into a  15 minute tirade on the idiots in the world who couldn’t see past her reflection.

I was stunned.  So many people in our culture (me included) would have believed her situation was close to heaven.

I guess the other grass isn't greener. Everyone has their cross to bear. Even if it's a cross dresser cross.

Plus, I knew the greatest majority of genetic women didn’t have her “looks” either but certainly found ways to live highly successful lives. You know the women I'm talking about,who just exude femininity and a zest for life.

I started to consider not being required to bring a lawn mower with me with my makeup. Maybe the grass wasn't greener on the other gender side. I have found though it is certainly as soft and inviting as I thought it would be. That's OK, I never did enjoying mowing grass!

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A Life in Gender Flux