I watched a video this morning which I will pass a link along to which has a guy (Walt) who went through the surgery, lived as a woman for a time and decided he made a mistake and changed back. To each his own, and people do make mistakes but I wonder how that epic mistake happens? I can only think there was some sort of disconnect in the gender socialization process.
I have not researched it, but I understand the reputable SRS surgeons and clinics still require some sort of history living as your chosen gender-before going under the knife. I'm under the impression that those in the know are calling the process gender socialization. From personal experience it is a fascinating and sometimes scary experience when you go from presenting as a woman versus being socialized as one. I just know I will go to my grave loving it. But that's just "not so little ol me".
Of course it 's possible to go out dressed as a woman and present yourself successfully and think Yay! I'm a girl Woo Hoo! It's also very possible to do it as essentially a stealth cross dresser. Not a problem in the world unless you begin to believe you can shortcut the socialization process in the girls sandbox. The worst place to attempt a stunt like that. You will find out quickly which gender isn't the "sugar & spice" one.
After all, who needs all that sand kicked in your face? Everyone will have to accept me as a woman after my SRS...Right? Not so fast happy campers, there is that one pesky problem-gender does not live between your legs and to my knowledge can not be operated into our brains.
By jumping ahead in the socialization process, you simply miss key yes or no moments. Examples you have read me write about here in Cyrsti's Condo are the feminine communication process and the intricacies of fitting into female social circles. Even in my very gray orientated mind...they are black and white learning experiences. You want to belong or you don't. Plus of course I'm just scratching the surface.
By paraphrasing Walt one more time he says something to the extent you can't fix a psychological problem with surgery DUH! He is totally correct and I'm fairly sure SRS does not include a lobotomy, for a good reason. (I know what you are thinking you need to add- not subtract to a male brain ) It has been fairly well documented these days that gender identity issues are not psychological problems. But I agree, one could develop if the person involved is not free to explore their feelings- as Walt surely wasn't.
At this point, every bone in my body is screaming "don't be snarky Crysti" and write what you are thinking. Since bones can't scream anyway- who the hell wants to hear from a person who made a fairly major mistake with his life and still has no idea why?
Why didn't he tell the truth and just say- look I'm just a cross dresser, got a sex change and then went through the ultimate purge to be with a woman who just can't image my past. Understood!!!!
Ahhh! I feel better now!
Here's your link here to "Crossover Kids" other than "Walter" it's a good piece.
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