Saturday, July 13, 2013

Where Have All the Sisters Gone?

A friend who I have mentioned more than once here in Cyrsti's Condo found ourselves in the middle of a pretty interesting chat/question recently concerning the seeming "non availability" of other trans sisters in any segment of the culture.

My friend and I go way back to the early 80's and actually met indirectly through one of the old Tri Ess chapters in Cleveland, Ohio. Through those "get together's" in discreet motels, we came to the conclusion we got to meet and know more people than in the present social media dominated society.

Why? I believe the in culture social stratification between the so called "haves and have not's" is a huge culprit.  Cross Dressers, Transgender folks and Transsexuals all have managed to exclude each other on one level or another.

Identifying transgender as I do, I feel the pressure from both sides. The cross dressers prejudge me as someone who looks down on them and I'm guilty of feeling that way about transsexual women judging me. "Back in the day", the prettier cross dressers did form their own cliques but we were still too naive to know the process would go so far past the immature high school antics. Way past!

Taking the process a step further, it's interesting to me how seemingly rare we are to ourselves. If you take me for an example (again) in the past five plus years of being really out - I have developed friendships with only two other transgender folk, one male, one female. Only 2. I won't bore you with how many different ways I was out looking- just for a friend or two. The positive twist on the story is I found them and they weren't trans.

I've always have been fascinated by the very few CD/TG/TS women I have seen over the years. I'm going to leave trans men out of this for a second. I can go back as far as 20 years in my mind and think maybe 5? Say what you will about maybe I missed more than a couple top notch presenters which is true but how about the girls like me just trying to "learn the ropes" 5?

I left the trans guys out of this for a reason. The reason is where I live these days I am seeing more and more individuals who I could possibly categorize in the trans man status.  But that is an entire other subject for another time. Just don't give me the BS it is easier for a trans guy to negotiate society. The demeanor of the person in with a Mo Hawk haircut in a big loose sweatshirt just didn't seem to indicate that was true.

Finally, I'm not going to be naive here and ignore the sexual component of meeting others in our culture.  For good or bad, sexual questions can be asked, accepted or rejected early in the game with the impact of social media. So those of us who feel that's a none of your business intrusion find our way to the social curb quickly.

So there you go, a few theories of why it's a lonely world in our culture...still.

Here is an example months ago when I saw this question on another site I go to on occasion:  "I want to meet a transgender person" After two months or so, I was one of two replies. I simply said I guessed no one really did. Even if they are transgender themselves.


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