Wednesday, September 25, 2013

Is It Too Late Not Too?

Awww right, I'm almost 64. If you are close to my age, surely you remember these lyrics from the Beatles classic:

When I get older losing my hair, Many years from now, Will you still be sending me a valentine Birthday greetings bottle of wine?

 If I'd been out till quarter to three Would you lock the door, Will you still need me, will you still feed me, When I'm sixty-four?

I can almost guarantee you that when I heard the song the first time, I had serious doubts about living until I was 64! Now that I'm almost to 64, I decided to celebrate the upcoming occasion here in the Cyrsti's Condo for once.  Mainly because of these reasons:  One, I don't care if someone knows my age.  Two, I'm still standing unlike many others I used to know ( if I knew I was going to live this long, I would have taken better care of myself) and Three, I perhaps could provide some insight into the process for those who may be considering it.

Feedback has been amazing.  Everything from I was called "just another old guy on hormones" to "like you, I considered transitioning but I'm too old" and there was Shelle.

Although we have never met, Shelle and I have become transgender sisters of sort. It turns out we share several powerful life experiences with this gender trip we are on.

Recently Shelle wrote a great post on her blog called "Why"?  In the post she answers a few of the questions of why she transitioned when she did:

"I am repeatedly ask by people why did you wait so long to transition,I have ask myself the same question a thousand times,I can only guess that like most people like me I thought that if I practiced “immersion therapy” I could cure what seemed to be wrong in my life.I like most trans women of my age group thought that by immersing myself in in the hyper-masculine world I would be somehow magically cured that it would rub off on my psyche and cure the fact that in reality I was a woman,But with little support and few coping skills the whole shared only proved to be a complete failure and things just continually got worse all my life not better or less confusing but more and more the focus of my everyday thoughts.

It wasn't until around 17 years ago when I met my last wife and shared from the beginning who I was with her and she in turn was not only supportive but with her love and everyday help I began to feel emboldened and the fog I lived under began to clear I saw a more clear path to the person I needed to become to finally have some sense of peace in my life and really begin to grow again."

Visit Shelle's blog here and if you haven't guessed, she may remember the song too!



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A Life in Gender Flux