Friday, October 25, 2013

Don't Hate me Because I'm....

You all have probably caught me up on my Cyrsti's Condo Soapbox whining and crying about pet peeves such as being roundly rejected by certain elements of the transgender society.  On one hand I'm too much girl for the cross dressers and on the other I'm not enough girl for the transsexuals. Blah, blah, blah...as Pat said in a comment here labels are just labels and how you interact with a person one on one is reality. As Vicki said if I was in the UK, I may have a whole different idea of being called a tranny and if I was black I may have a whole different reaction to being called "girl".

Today though, on another site I'm active on, I was told, "I should be happy I was able to transition at all." Well, DUH, I am of course.  I responded to the person, "I'm happy to be here at all", when you consider three years ago I was coming out of what I call the dark years of my life. Back then,  I didn't care if I lived or died and none of it had to do with gender. In the three years previous, I lost my wife of 25 years, three of the closet friends to death I had ever known and my business. Oh, and did I mention I'm also bi-polar?

What few people know is I was and am a very independent, guarded person. So picking up the pieces on my own was tough and I almost didn't make it.  Now I find the irony in those I meet who think the pleasure I find in life right now has always been a part of me. It took me years to quit being a "victim" and I happened upon an idea to pay forward and get out of the rut I was in. You are reading it.

When I started Cyrsti's Condo back in the day, I barely knew what a blog was. Connie in Seattle was reading my posts on another site and suggested I begin writing my experiences on my own blog and here we are.  My goals were and are as simple as I am...maybe I can help others with the crazy experiences I have managed to live through in 64 years.

As I said, hell yes I'm happy to be here and my heart literally sings when the world becomes mine for the taking as a woman but damn it was tough to get here. As unfair as it is to discriminate against me for not being a cross dresser or transsexual, it is as bad for resenting me for simply seizing an opportunity in my life and writing about it.

So don't hate me because I'm transitioning.  I know many of you just can't and I respect that but I'm fairly sure you don't want to take the route I did to get here.  If you do, I'm behind you all the way!


No comments:

Post a Comment

A Life in Gender Flux