Saturday, January 11, 2014

The Purse Monster and Muscle Memory

This will seem like such a small piece in the huge transgender MtF transition puzzle but then again it's not.

For many years I have noticed with interest how women approach moving and grasping items with their hands.  Regardless of the inherent size difference in the hands, most genetic women just seemed to have more dexterity working for them.

Now, as I work my way through counters and clerks with my purse and it's wallet, I find I need more coordination to accomplish all the moves.  Gone are the days of picking up the change and shoving it into my pockets and moving on. Plus, just tossing everything into my purse doesn't work either.  If I don't keep some sort of basic organization going in my purse, then I am doomed to carry a stylish yet deadly "bottomless bag." You know the purses I'm talking about.  If you have lived around a woman for any length of time, the "changing of the bags" is often not pretty.  No one knows what is living down there and how the hell did the purse get that heavy? Things were breeding similar to how life began on Earth.

As I transition into more and more full time "purse living", I know now. I'm developing the "layers" of "stuff" women accumulate over time.  It's comparable to an archaeological dig when you uncover that old lipstick you loved and couldn't find. It disappeared into the bottom layer of my purse and was waiting patiently to see the light of day again. Forget the "boob pinch" pain I felt a couple nights ago, the real pain could be lurking in the bottom of my purse and will it attack with no warning?

Look, the last thing I want to be doing is holding up a line at a counter while I dig through my purse, get attacked and lose a finger.  People do have a tendency to care less if I am transgender in line but care a lot if I'm slow. Just imagine if they had to call the paramedics to reattach my finger?  How would the peeps behind me buy their "cigs" or lottery tickets?

I have a plan though to combat all of this, I call my new "dexterity" a slide move.  At the counter, I know the basics of what I'm paying with, what kind of change or receipt I am going to get and where it's coming from and going in my purse.  The smoother I can accomplish all of that, the more feminine I appear or at the least fit in.

In order to insure success though is repetition and committing the moves into my muscle memory.  Now if I can keep my purse from sliding off my shoulder at the wrong time and messing up the entire process- life will be better!  "Sigh" Who would have thunk it that all this "girl stuff" would have been so complex! Women make it look so easy and they still have all their fingers. It's because Mom warned them to beware of what could be lurking in their purses!

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A Life in Gender Flux