Sunday, August 10, 2014

Purging

Over the years and way before Cyrsti's Condo was a glitter in anybody's eye,  (or a speck of dust) I was always amazed by the amount of "joiners' and "purgers" in the cross dressing community.  Of course I shouldn't have been because I "almost" purged a couple of times and made a public spectacle (to my wife) by tossing "key items" out and stashing others.

Most cross dressers I knew for a short time were just "passing through" and some weren't but for the most part I never have met or known anyone who simply purged and never had any contact with cross dressing again.  My best example was a friend who I met first as a CD in the 1980's who purged and pledged to never revisit dressing as a woman again.  To my knowledge he didn't-but did have a lengthy on line relationship with a man who was totally convinced he was a genetic woman.  Somehow, I don't think that was "purging."

The person I always wondered about though,  was a cross dresser who attended the CD mixers in Cleveland in the 80's.  She was attractive, accomplished and an "A" lister- capable of letting you know you really didn't belong in her circles.  She had nailed the "high school social bitch" -completely.  Suddenly, one night she amazed all of us by announcing she had found the love of her life and would forever forsaking her "womanhood."  Notice, I put womanhood in parenthesis, As my wife so profoundly put it, (she despised him) and no matter how this cross dresser looked, he had no idea of what it was to be a woman.

All these years later, I wonder if she did toss that high priced wardrobe and heels in the trash and never walked again on the feminine side..  Odds are, no he didn't and since the new miracle worker girlfriend wasn't with him that night, did she ever know.

Those are just two examples of individuals who went everywhere from back in the closet to the bright lights of society and then into stealth I knew in the past.

At this time of my life, my fear of purging is completely tied into my meds. What would happen if health considerations forced me to stop my HRT therapy?  More on that in a later post.

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A Life in Gender Flux