Wednesday, October 29, 2014

I Didn't Have to Practice

I have two people in my life who have had a difficult time adjusting to who I am. Both from different perspectives.

One is from my distant cross dressing past and the other my deceased wife's sister.  I'm fairly sure I mention them too often here in Cyrsti's Condo.  So, to cut straight to my point, I'm about ready to cut ties with one (sister in law) and on occasion think I'm getting my point across to the other.

Here is the example.  He often sends me YouTube videos of mainly drag queen transformations and critiques them heavily.  Not a problem with that. If I have the time to watch them, I do too.  Today though, he sent me a fairly simple straight forward video involving an effeminate blond man.  I replied, I wish I had his skin and build to work with. He replied back "except the nose." I said wow! That was quite the catty comment, better pull in those claws.

What really got to me was he said "you must be practicing on your feminine responses."  I became more than a little frustrated and said "when will you learn, I'm way past the practice mode."  I just let my natural self come out and here she is. 

Ironically, the whole point fits in well into my Frock Magazine series about transitioning later in life. Indeed what have been my biggest surprises? One was when I found building a new circle of friends was easier to rebuild from scratch; than to babysit the few remaining ones I still had. Who for the most part refused to even consider I wasn't going through some sort of a late mid life gender crises.  (Like the two above.)

So no, I didn't have to practice much. My friends brought the real me out of me. I had it easy. Not having to practice per se' just was icing on the cake. I knew quickly I was doing the right thing.

The pleasant surprise was I didn't know I was getting it this right.

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A Life in Gender Flux