Monday, May 11, 2015

I am Just a Blank Page

Several times here in Cyrsti's Condo recently I have mentioned my upcoming workshop at this years Trans Ohio Symposium. Surprising, I remember my pledge to myself and Liz last year to be less of a "talking transgender head" jabbering away in front of a group of mixed people. By mixed I mean a predominance of "more mature" questioning transgender or "exploring" cross dressers mixed with spouses searching for a little look at what could be one of the biggest decisions of their lives. Changing gender.

The process is especially difficult as we know for many of us seniors who have spent a life with (what I just heard it called) testosterone poisoning. Precious passing privilege is tough to come by. All of those factors combine to make me an unlikely or maybe highly likely trans woman to talk about all of this.

First of all, the Trans Ohio Symposium percentage wise has fewer "older" attendee's and even fewer of those who identify as a woman. The weekend conference is heavily balanced towards a younger group and many of them transgender men. But that's all good. I don't need an auditorium full of people to fulfill some sort of an ego trip. Just a few connections would be fulfilling. Realistically I know we senior transgender women could be the largest segment of the entire trans spectrum still heavily closeted.

So, this year, instead of the convoluted agenda I submitted for approval; I am going to pass out a blank piece of paper and pencil to everyone. On the paper of course they need to write down what they want to learn from the hour.  (My last two workshops have been the quickest hours of my life.)  Plus, I am going the extra distance to offer my partner Liz as an extra contact to spouses and significant other generics. What else is she going to do? (Kidding) Also, I am going to print a "before" picture of me from the blog-so attendee's can see how far (or not) I have come.

I look at it this way. I have no problem of jabbering for an hour on the whys and hows of my Mtf transition and still miss someone's most important question. HRT alone can fill an hour!

At the least-we will see how many of the attendees ask for my crayons!

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A Life in Gender Flux