Yet another round of Doctor's visits today at the VA, this time with my endocrinologist (all fluids checked out OK) But today the visit was different in that I had two residents in the room, eager for a training look at a true transgender woman.
So for a half hour or so, I was subjected to medical questions plus the usual breast exam by the Doc who always points out the difference between my hormone induced girls and a cis girls.
As I was leaving, I couldn't help but notice each of the training docs were at the least my size and attractive. On my way down in the elevator, I couldn't help but remember what Jazz Jennings Mother had detailed if Jazz had not had hormone blockers. How would I have turned out?
First of all, it is such a mute point, it is almost fun to think about. How about, turning Connie loose on this one: "If life Gives you Lemons, you make Lemonade." Go ahead and substitute balls at your leisure.
Second of all, the blockers are expensive to the tune of one thousand dollars a month.
Finally, I don't see all my time as a guy as a waste, specifically when I consider my daughter and grand kids- by far my most precious possessions.
On the other hand, just the idea of having a body as intensely feminine as the two residents today was intoxicating.
Of course I will never know, and most of the time think I am playing with house money at the age of 66.
But I will take it. I just heard yesterday, a younger person I had worked closely with years ago suddenly passed away.
So, just reshuffle the deck and call me a survivor, and that works too.