Friday, October 21, 2016

Me and My Estrogen

It's no secret one of the most powerful demarcation points of moving from cross dresser to transgender is when you take your first dosage of estrogen-be it in a pill, shot or patch.

Interestingly in our nit-picking trans community, one doesn't need the hormone at all to feel any more feminine or needs it to feel whole. (As it was for me.) So. to each their own! They may already have high doses of estrogen in their system already.

This post came to me yesterday as I was changing out my estrogen patches. As I did it, I thought back to my first doctor who subscibed me a minimum dosage with the "warning" my breasts would grow slightly and my hair a lot. Both were true and as my dosage increased so did my breast size which I estimate to be close to a "D" now. All I know my breasts define a deeper sense of feminity within me which I assume is normal with a cis woman too. Also, psychological or not, I feel a sense of having an emotional "period" if I miss a dose of estrogen.

I remember too, the less than intelligent comment I got from one guy who said he wished he could grow his breasts too, so he could play with them. Some comments just never go away like I was just "another old guy on hormones."

The point most never realize with HRT is most of it is mental. My emotions changed as quickly and completely as my body.

I have been on this route for nearly four years now, and have never doubted it was the right move for me. I have adapted nicely to how I see the world now from a different perspective and how it sees me. 

I always felt I was mainly non passable but went ahead and lived my life anyhow. Another someone once told me I passed out of sheer will power. Once thing HRT did do for me was soften my facial features and gave me the "no turning back" kick in the rear to live a feminine life.

Now it seems, much of the world is catching up with me, especially the millenial generation and below. Most are gender blind and some even think being transgender is cool to an extent.

So, having my own hair and breasts is connecting more dots making my life easier, but again HRT is in no way is neccessary for all of us to do the same.

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A Life in Gender Flux